1. “Oh, that’s terrific! Why don’t you just feed me to the lions? Step on my head when I am drowning.” ― Jeremy Grey
2. “You’re like that crazy guest who thinks he’s part of the family already.” — Claire Cleary
3. “Yeah, it could have been the soft mattress. Or the midnight rape. Or the nude gay art show that took place in my room. One of those probably added to the lack of sleep.” ― Jeremy Grey
4. “I’m sorry I called you a hillbilly. I don’t even know what that meant.” ― John Beckwith
5. “Grief is nature’s most powerful aphrodisiac, look it up.” ― Chazz Reinhold
6. “I hope you flip your bike over and knock your two front teeth out! You selfish son of a bitch! You leave me in the trenches taking grenades, John!” – Jeremy Grey
7. “I’m a little too traumatized to have a scone.” ― Jeremy Grey
8. “I feel totally ridiculous. Like why do I have to be in camouflage? So the big bad quail doesn’t see me?” – Jeremy Grey
9. “You motorboatin’ son of a b*tch! You old sailor you! Where is she? She still in the house?” – Jeremy Grey
10. “She’s fit for a straight-jacket. This broad’s sucked three ways towards the weekend. But you know what, father? I dig it! It turns me on.” ― Jeremy Grey
11. “Grab that net and catch that beautiful butterfly pal.” ― Jeremy Grey
12. “Oh, he says he believes in art, but all I’ve seen him do is dribble his own blood on a canvas and smear it around with a stick!” —William Cleary
13. “Wow, getting a nice preview of what marriage is gonna be like with Ike Turner here.” ― Jeremy Grey
14. “I’m not perfect, but who are we kidding, neither are you. And you want to know what? I dig it.” ― Jeremy Grey
15. “You shut your mouth when you’re talking to me!” – Mrs. Kroeger
16. “I’m sorry I called you a hillbilly. I don’t even know what that meant.” ― John Beckwith
17. “You know how they say we only use 10 percent of our brains? I think we only use 10 percent of our hearts.” ― John Beckwith
18. “Don’t waste your time on girls with hats. They tend to be very proper.” ― John Beckwith
19. “Don’t ever leave me.” “Good. ‘Cause I’d find you!” – Gloria Cleary
20. “I am going to go dance with the little flower girl. Oh, and I might be a charter member of Oprah’s book club.” ― John Beckwith
21. “What are you doing? It’s a game of touch football, every time I look over, you’re on your ass again.” ― John Beckwith
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