Steven Wright was born in 1955 and is an American comedian, writer and actor. He is most known for his monologue style of stand-up comedy, which he has performed throughout his career.
He came to fame in the early 1980s when he began appearing on The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson. Wright later starred in a series of HBO specials that were critically acclaimed, winning him several Emmy Awards.
Wright’s comedy can be described as surreal, absurdist, and often darkly comic. He has also been noted for his unique voice, which some critics have said sounds like “a robot learning how to talk”.
Here are some of the most thoughtful and inspiring quotes from Steven Wright, a legendary comedian that will describe his illustrious career and great lines
23 Steven Wright Quotes That You Must Read Now
1. “It’s a small world, but I wouldn’t want to have to paint it.” – Steven Wright
2. “The sooner you fall behind, the more time you’ll have to catch up.” – Steven Wright
3. “The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.” – Steven Wright
4. “The judge asked, “What do you plead?” I said, “Insanity, your honor, who in their right mind would park in the passing lane?” ― Steven Wright
5. “I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren’t included.” – Steven Wright
6. “To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.” – Steven Wright
7. “The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.” – Steven Wright
8. “Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them.” – Steven Wright
9. “If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.” – Steven Wright
10. “Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.” – Steven Wright
11. “If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?” – Steven Wright
12. “Someone sent me a postcard picture of the earth. On the back it said, “Wish you were here.” ― Steven Wright
13. “What’s another word for Thesaurus?” – Steven Wright
14. “If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate.” – Steven Wright
15. “The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.” – Steven Wright
16. “The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.” – Steven Wright
17. “In my house on the ceilings I have paintings of the rooms above…so I never have to go upstairs.” – Steven Wright
18. “If you write the word “monkey” a million times, do you start to think you’re Shakespeare?” – Steven Wright
19. “What happens if you get scared half to death twice?” – Steven Wright
20. “If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before.” – Steven Wright
21. “If you can wave a fan, and you can wave a club, can you wave a fan club?” – Steven Wright
22. “When everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.” – Steven Wright
23. “If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.” – Steven Wright
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