95+ Funniest Mom Jokes of All Time

Have you ever heard a joke that only a mom would understand? Mother jokes can indeed be funny, but why is that? It could be because these jokes are based on the everyday experiences of moms and the struggles they face. From juggling work and family to dealing with picky eaters, these jokes tap into the shared experience of being a mom.

Motherhood can be both difficult and rewarding, but these jokes remind us that it’s all worth it in the end cause it makes us laugh due to the shared experiences that all mothers have in common.

Whether you’re a mom yourself or just appreciate the humour in these types of jokes, here we’ve compiled a list of the best Mom Jokes that you will relate to them. So scroll down and see what we’ve got you covered.

Funniest Mom Jokes

1. What three words solve dad’s every problem?

Ask your mother.

2. You know you’re a mom when picking up another human to smell their butt isn’t only normal, but necessary.

3. What do you call a mom who can’t draw?


4. What color flowers do mama cats like to get?

Purrrrrrrple flowers.

5. Motherhood: Because going to the bathroom in private is over-rated.

6. How do you get the kids to be quiet?

Say, “Mum’s the word.

7. Everything you do is so mom point.

8. Why did the mommy cat want to go bowling?

She was an alley cat.

9. I whale always love you, mom.

10. If you are not yelling at your kids, you’re not spending enough time with them. (ref).

11. Every mother ever: I’m warning you, If you fall and break your legs, don’t come running to me.

12. Motherhood has shown me that you don’t need fun to have alcohol.

13. What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?

Where’s Pop-corn?

14. Why was the house so neat on Mother’s Day?

Because Mom spent all day Saturday cleaning it.

15. You know you’re a mom when you understand why Mama Bear’s porridge was too cold.

16. Are my kids perfect?

No, but we can blame dad for that one.

17. Spit up is my new favorite accessory; no outfit is complete without it.

18. What did the digital clock say to its mom?

Look, mom! No hands.

19. Cleaning with kids in the house is like brushing your teeth with Oreos.

20. What sweets do astronaut moms like?

Mars bars.

21. When your mom’s voice is so loud, even your neighbors brush their teeth and get dressed.

22. Why is a computer so smart?

Because it listens to its motherboard.

23. Kid: Mom, stop. You aren’t funny.

Mom: I made you.

24. I child-proofed my house but my kids can still get in.

25. When your mom asks if you want some advice, remember it is a rhetorical question.

26. What did the Egyptian child say when it was afraid?

I want my mummy.

27. I stubbed my toe and my mom shouted at me for yelling, “What the duck!” She was angry that I used fowl language.

28. Baby snake: “Mommy, are we poisonous?”

Mommy snake: “Yes, son. Why?”

Baby snake: “I just bit my tongue.

29. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?


Omelet who?

Omelet Mommy sleep in today.

30. The fastest way to spread news isn’t on the internet. It’s by telling your mom.

31. What’s the fastest land mammal?

A toddler who’s been asked what’s in their mouth.

32. Silence is golden. Unless you have kids, then silence is suspicious.

33. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?


Howard who?

Howard you like breakfast in bed mommy?

34. Nothing is truly lost until Mom can’t find it.

35. What kind of bags do moms collect?

Eye bags.

36. What did the panda give his mommy?

A bear hug.

37. I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I’ll let you know.

38. Roses are red, Violets are blue. My mom’s jokes, Are funnier than you.

39. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?


Adore who?

Adore you mommy.

40. What’s a mom joke?

Look in the mirror, kiddo.

41. How do you keep little cows quiet, so their mommy can sleep late?

Use the moooooote button.

42. Why did mom get a plate of English muffins on Mother’s Day?

Her family wanted her to feel like a queen.

43. Science teacher: “When is the boiling point reached?”

Student: “When my mother sees my report card.

44. Being a mom has taught me that the main cause of dehydration in small children is bedtime.

45. My kids: 3 out of 5 stars, could have been a bit quieter.

46. What did the mama say to the foal?

It’s pasture your bedtime.

47. My nickname is Mom. But my full name is “Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom.

48. Why did they have to rush the mommy rattlesnake to the doctor?

She bit her tongue.

49. What makes more noise than a child jumping on mommy’s bed?

Two children jumping on mommy’s bed.

50. I’m my kids’ favorite person to overthink things with.

51. Yoda best mom. Love you, I do.

52. Licked a dark smear off my finger, and then thought, “Phew it’s chocolate.

53. Not old, just retro.

54. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?


Llama who?

Llama Llama, I love my mama.

55. What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?

Where’s Popcorn?”.

56. At my age I’m no longer a snack; I’m a Happy Meal. I come with toys and kids.

57. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Yo mama.

Yo mama who?

Yo mama who knows you didn’t throw out the garbage like I asked you to.

58. Why did the bean children give their mom a sweater?

She was chili.

59. What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It’s time to go to sweep.

60. Why pay a therapist when you have me?

61. Kid: Mom, can I have $20?

Mom: Am I made of money?

Kid: Wait, that’s not what M.O.M. means?

62. What warm drink helps mom relax?

Calm-omile tea.

63. What did the Mama tomato say to the baby tomato?


64. From what I have learned as a mom, motherhood means repeatedly getting up right after you had just sat down one second ago.

65. What kind of sweets do astronaut moms like?

Mars bars.

66. What did Mommy spider say to baby spider?

You spend too much time on the web.

67. Here’s one way to teach the kids about irony: scream, “STOP SCREAMING.

68. My mom told me I’d never amount to anything because I procrastinate too much. I said, “Oh, yeah? Just you wait.

69. I don’t want to sleep like a baby. I want to sleep like my husband.

70. The two amounts of pasta I’m best at cooking:

1. not enough

2. enough for 3,000 people.

71. What kind of flowers are best for Mother’s Day?


72. What do you call a short mom?

A mini-mum.

73. I like telling mom jokes. Sometimes, she laughs.

74. What was Cleopatra’s favorite day of the year?

Mummy’s day.

75. Mom, thanks for providing me with womb and board for all of these years.

76. Why did the baby strawberry cry?

Because his mom was in a jam.

77. It’s spicy” is the universal mom code word for “I don’t want to share.

78. Pointed look from mom: “Give you money? Oh, honey, I already gave you life.

79. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?


Ivana who?

Ivana give you a kiss for Mother’s Day.

80. Why was it so hard for the pirate to call his mom?

Because she left the phone off the hook.

81. Mommy doesn’t have a favorite child—you all annoy me equally.

82. What did the mama tomato say to the baby tomato?

Catch up.

83. Why did the cookie cry?

Because his mother was a wafer so long.

84. Yes, please get a new cup every time you need water — said no mom ever.

85. If evolution really worked moms would have more than two hands.

86. It’s spicy: universal Mom Code for ‘I don’t want to share.’

87. If a mom doesn’t have a used gift bag full of other used gift bags, is she even a mom?

88. Mom’s recipe for iced coffee:

1. Have kids.

2. Make coffee.

3. Forget you made coffee.

4. Drink it cold.

89. Why did the mommy horse want to race on a rainy day?

She was a mudder.

90. What’s it like to have the best daughter in the world?

You’ll have to ask grandma.

91. Mothers of teens understand why some animals eat their young.

92. What was Cleopatra’s favorite day of the year?

Mummy’s Day.

93. When did you know you were a mother?

When I realized 90 percent of my day was locating someone else’s lost crap.

94. Son: “Mom, what’s a weekend?”

Mom: “I don’t know, sweetheart, I haven’t had one since you were born.

95. I’m sorry, please excuse the mess. My children are busy making memories feral.

96. Having a weird mom builds character.

Read More

Must Read

Related Articles